Ohmigod, I don’t want to get ahead of myself or anything, but I think it may be time for Luke and Noah to finally do the deed. See, things were incredibly boring and ridiculous for a few weeks, so I didn’t want to recap them because they were so awful. Noah and Muslim girl are married and her hijab has gradually gotten looser and looser. Like, first it was all up around her neck like a wimple, then, after she started flirting with Casey, she became more and more immodest. We can track her corruption quite efficiently.
ANYWAY! Noah and MG move into an apartment that had been recently vacated by some other people. Fortunately it’s free and furnished. This was to throw Homeland Security off of their tail. Because, you know, every single suspected green card marriage gets it’s own field agent.
Now Luke and Noah finally get to be alone together! How do they start it? By running and jumping on the bed like a couple of mental patients. It’s the most awkward, un-hot thing I’ve ever seen. It may be worse than when Henry and Vienna fucked that one time, because Luke and Noah are really giving it their all. The panting. The ripping off of henleys.
Meanwhile, back in the town square, Muslim girl is telling Casey that she’s in love with Noah. “No way!” you say. Way, I say. So Casey suggests that they go right back to the free and furnished bungalow and tell Noah how she feels about him. Because isn’t that just the best idea you’ve ever heard?
A week or so ago this gang of four had a big freak-out about going to some party. It had to appear that Noah and Muslim girl were totally together, so Luke made Casey pretend to be a homo, just for one night, so they could keep up appearances, lest INS is lurking in the bushes. They didn’t go into it, but I have a sneaking suspicion that later that night Casey believed Luke when he said he’d just put in the tip.
So after this huge build up of “OK! This is what we’re gonna do!” They got to the party and nobody else was there, except the fugly couple throwing the party. Then they proceeded to sit and talk about their rare predicament. Way to keep it a secret, guys.
Then we cut back to Luke and Noah who are grappling at one another like rodeo clowns, and there’s a knock at the door. Who would want to interrupt actual queers kissing like lovers on the lips?
OH SHIT! It’s the Feds!
The want to come in and take a look around. Meanwhile, Muslim girl is legging it in the window. Just in time for INS guy to open the door, where he finds her jerking her scarf into place. There’s another knock at the door! It’s Luke, who also legged it out a window, and Casey, pretending to be gay. Suffice to say, they don’t have to pretend too hard. Those dudes could be sitting at opposite corners of Owen field and someone on the 50 yard line would figure out that those two probably fucking.
Woah! Dodged a bullet there gang! But it’s starting to take it’s toll on Nuke. I’d go into it, but it’s too silly. Honestly, just imagine the most retarded conversation two people in an argument could say to one another. That’s it.
Luke storms back to San Snyderfarm Estate and tells his dad how lucky he is to be free to be with the person they love. Lame. So lame.
Oh, wow. Noah and Muslim girl are painfully talking about how INS could come back later that night, so they have no choice but to sleep in the same bed. They have to!
Tune in tomorrow when we finally see Muslim girl’s hair.